Only Ever Yours by Louse O'Neill

*MILD ENDING SPOILERS (NO REAL DETAILS)*

I first read this book almost in one sitting on one frenzied day during exam time. It was probably the worst time possible to be engulfed by a book but it was so compelling that I couldn't put it down. I promptly finished it and while I was desperate to share my thoughts on it, I was so emotionally-drained that I wasn't quite sure what those thoughts were. A couple of months later, I picked it up again and once more finished it in a day. It's that good.

Only Ever Yours is an emotional gut-punch of a book, in a similar way to how Some Girls Are was. To quickly sum up the plot, global warming has hit, resulting in a future where the only women who exist are 'eves'-perfect girls grown by scientists to serve men. There are three ways eves can accomplish this: companionship (a marriage of sorts), becoming a concubine (prostitute) or (the most dreaded third) remaining at their school to teach future generations as a chastity. The school is where eves live until the end of their 16th year and where they are taught important things like how to hate your body and how only men matter.

Obviously this book is an exaggeration of a modern-day issue, like many great sci-fi books. I can't even begin to describe how compelling I found this world which is surprising given how relatively simple it is. I think what I loved most is how gradually and quietly the horror seeps in. The protagonist casually tells us about how all companions are terminated when they turn 40, how female babies rot in the womb and how infertile companions willingly burn themselves alive so that their husband may choose a 'better' eve to replace her. It's very realistic in the way the main character doesn't realise the horror herself, having grown up in this world. Unlike some dystopian protagonists, she has no unlikely liberal views tainting her view of her world.

Speaking of the protagonist, Frieda is about as heartbreaking a character as they come. She is utterly broken by the world around her and yet is powerless to do anything about it, not that she would have the insight to do anything if she wasn't. The other characters are equally engaging-even evil Megan is vaguely sympathetic in that she is only doing what she has to in order to survive (not that that stops you hating her). By the time the ending comes, you feel as broken as poor Frieda in the best way. Again, this isn't a book I can say I 'enjoyed' reading but it's one I am eternally grateful I did.

Oh, and the ending. It crushed me completely both times and yet, what else did I expect? This isn't the sort of book which can have a happy ending and Frieda is not the sort of character who gets one. And in the end, who is really happy anyway? Not a single character gets what they want, or if they do then it turns out to be a hollow victory. The ending really hammers home the theme of the book, right down to the last bleak sentence.

In case you couldn't tell, I love this book. It's one of those I think everyone needs to experience and like Some Girls Are, it will haunt me forever. It carries an important message in a well-written and utterly compelling package. I strongly recommend you check it out

Overall Rating:

Vanishing Girls by Lauren Oliver

MAJOR SPOILERS IN THIS REVIEW. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.

Okay, after being deeply underwhelmed by Panic, my hopes weren't all that high for this book. The blurb sounded interesting but I wasn't sure what to expect. To my surprise though, I actually got drawn in pretty quickly. Unlike Panic, the characters in this book were very compelling and actually felt like detailed, potentially real people.

Imagine my horror when I discovered one of them wasn't real.

Yeah, unfortunately this book decided to go with the whole split-personality thing. To its credit, I didn't see it coming. However, that's mostly because it makes NO FREAKING SENSE WHATSOEVER.

Seriously, I understand that twists kinda seem necessary these days but this book definitely didn't need one. All it needed was a decent resolution to the plot it set up but instead of that, we get this cheap copout ending. It doesn't fit at all with the story-if Dara has been dead all along, why are her parents talking about her in private emails (that Nick doesn't see) as if she's still alive? Why aren't they more concerned by Nick expecting her sister to show up? Why is her phone still so active? When I read the big reveal, I didn't feel excited or satisfied. All I felt was shock followed by a slow, sinking feeling in my gut.

I can't even begin to really explain how disappointed this book made me. There's nothing worse that a book which is almost enjoyable and for that reason I can't give it a very high rating, no matter how good 3/4s of it were.

Overall Score:

.5

All the Rage by Courtney Summers

One of the many things I love about Courtney Summers as an author is that her books always, always have something to say. They're brutal and ugly and almost painful to read in their honesty yes, but each one says something that needs to be said. Unfortunately, I don't think All the Rage follows this trend.

Rape books. Rape is a tough subject to write about and I am not one of those people who think you shouldn't write about something just because of that. But rape has been covered so many times in YA fiction that honestly, I don't see why we need another book about it. Yes, the majority of rape books cover the subject so badly that it shouldn't be allowed. Yes, All the Rage actually manages to cover the topic well and doesn't shy away from the unpleasantness of it all. But it's still a rape book and, as a story, we all know how those go. I don't think anyone thinks rape is right (what constitutes as rape is a different matter but that's not touched on here) and so, what does this book say that is new?

Don't get me wrong, this is still a fantastically-written story and it does have some interesting elements presented in the usual raw style. It doesn't pull any punches. If you read any book about rape it should probably be this one. I just think in comparison to Summers' other books (particularly Some Girls Are which is very similar but infinitely better) it falls a bit flat.

My other main problem with it was the ending. Summers' usually ends books abruptly and without resolution but this was one of the worst examples I've seen. While with the others I can usually make some excuse for it, this book was definitely lacking. That doesn't mean I don't understand why it ended where it did but it was incomplete in a way that doesn't justify it. I felt the story owed me more that it gave and there was no true payoff to getting emotionally invested in it.

The bottom line? If you only read one book by Summers, go for Some Girls Are. Otherwise this is sill miles better than most YA fiction out there, if not deeply more uncomfortable to read.

Overall Rating:

.5

Fifty Shades of Grey: Chapters 10-15

Brief Recap: Ana meets Grey's mother, Grey gives her a computer and they start emailing. Ana reads the contract properly, they meet to discuss it and eventually she agrees to be Grey's sub. Also Ana graduates.

Thoughts: Ah, now here's the dickish Christian Grey I was waiting for. Not that he hasn't shown signs of being a dick before this point but this is the part of the book where he really becomes intolerable. There are red flags all over this relationship.

"But I'm worried you'll hurt me."

~

"I could make you stay," he threatens

~

"You scare me when you're angry,"

NONE OF THESE ARE SIGNS YOU SHOULD BE ENTERING A RELATIONSHIP WITH THIS MAN ANA. Especially not when he literally says he doesn't want you to think about what's right because he'll do it for you.

 “All those decisions – all the wearying thought processes behind them. The – is this the right thing to do? Should this happen here? Can it happen now? You wouldn't have to worry about any of that detail.”

Christian is sooooo creepy. As a joke, Ana sends him an email saying 'it was nice knowing you'. He takes it seriously and shows up at her house to persuade her through sex to change her mind. Sure, he concedes on minor points and to be fair, Ana has a lot more of a backbone than I expected. But she completely ignores the fact she doesn't want a sub/dom relationship. She basically says 'I don't want to be whipped' and he's like 'No, you'll like it, trust me'. And she agrees to it! This is some deeply unhealthy relationship stuff here.

I expected to hate the emails but honestly, they're probably one of the best parts. At least Ana sticks up for herself more via email. Also there's no weird asparagus flirting.

Chapter 15 ends with them having sex for the first time since she agreed to be his sub and what does he do? Tell her she can do anything she wants, she's in charge! He basically taunts her with what she won't ever experience with him again.

This is definitely the worst set of chapters so far. I have a horrible feeling this is the start of a very slippery slope

Fifty Shades of Grey: Chapters 6-10

Brief Recap: Ana wakes up in Grey's bed and he tells her they slept together but didn't have sex (still creepy). Also she isn't wearing pants. He tells her he likes her but there are some things she should know about him before they go any further. He then kisses her dramatically in the elevator because mixed messages are perfectly acceptable. Later on they go to his house and he introduces her to his Room of Eternal Kinkiness and shows her the Sub/Dom contract. She informs him she's a virgin and he's so outraged that he generously takes her virginity right there and then. Sexy times happen, morning times happen and the chapter ends with the arrival of Grey's mother.

Thoughts: Well, we have our first sex scene! And it didn't disappoint. A lot of these chapters is just setting up the whole BDSM concept which unfortunately is kinda problematic. You see, Grey's 'contract' isn't really what BDSM is all about. I mean, it can be but it's a much more mutual thing than this book makes out. Just because Grey is the Dom doesn't mean he gets to decide everything about their relationship without any discussion whatsoever. Also, his reaction to Ana's virgin status is definitely not okay. Despite claiming he doesn't do 'vanilla', he has regular sex with her so she can see what it's like. He is the true king of mixed messages, doing things whilst claiming the whole time that he 'never does them'.

The sex scenes themselves aren't the worst I've ever read but they're hardly realistic. Ana's first time and she feels no pain and has three orgasms. Also, there's even more of unrealistically innocent Ana here. Apparently she has never masturbated/orgasmed either because she's had no sexual feelings whatsoever until Christian shows up with his magical penis.

Christian. Oh dear lord. He has sex like a robot, I swear.

'I am going to take you from behind, Anastasia'.
'Anastasia, I am going to come in your mouth '.
'Error 404-orgasm file not found'.

Ana's subconscious is starting to get on my wick as well. It honestly reads like Ana has some deep psychological problem with the way she's either berating herself or urging herself to be more daring. This kind of inner conflict isn't healthy guys! Ana's repressing so hard that there's no way it can end well.

I'm interested to see how much of the book becomes sex after this. Since the last 5 chapters featured no one but Ana and Christian, it doesn't bode well for the rest of it.

Current Opinion: Getting worse but still palatable

Fifty Shades of Grey: Chapters 1-5

So I've finally decided to do it. Yes, I am going to read 50 Shades of Grey. In order to be able to stomach it though (and to give it a more detailed review) I'm going to split it up into sets of 5 chapters. Hopefully this will make it easier to swallow.

I don't think this really needs much background explanation. If you don't know this book, Google it. Done? Okay, good. So this was a Twilight fanfiction turned goldmine BDSM book. The basic story is vulnerable virgin meets experienced sexy millionaire and they have lots of kinky sexy sex together. I probably won't be too graphic in my reviews of this but I might quote particularly funny parts so be warned if that sort of thing offends you.

Brief recap of chapter contents: Anastasia Steele (henceforth known as 'Ana') meets Christian Grey when she has to interview him for her college newspaper. They then meet again at her place of work where he buys rope and cable ties (subtle book) and finally yet again for a photo shoot. This leads to a coffee date. Ana goes out after her final exams and gets super drunk, hit on by her friend Jose and rescued by Grey.

Thoughts: Okay, so far this isn't as bad as I feared. Christian is a douche from the get go but Ana is not as weak as I expected, nor as one-dimensional. She's still not great but she has a pretty substantial
life of her own at the moment. Of course, I fully expect this to vanish when they actually start having a romance.

Kate is a plot device really, nothing more. She's someone for Ana to muse about occasionally and to talk to about Christian. Again, she's alright but suffers from a bad case of 'show don't tell'. Instead of describing Kate through actions, we know everything we know about her because Ana tells us it.

Things that annoy me so far-Ana is far too innocent, weirdly so. Apparently she has never drunk before she gets super drunk in Chapter 5 which I find it very hard to believe given that she's 21 and has just finished college. Of course, it would be different if it was a personal choice but it seems more like she's just never gotten round to it. Christian is also awful in this chapter-after rescuing Ana from sexual assault and watching her throw up, he then takes her to the dance floor and they dance until she literally passes out. Because clearly the perfect time to tango is right after you've vomited up two litres of margaritas.

Unfortunately, far too many elements of this remind me of Twilight. Jose is very similar to Jacob in physical description and the role he plays as the best friend/third love triangle part. Their dads are best friends too (something I'm sure will never be mentioned again and so serves only to highlight its Twilight roots) and he does the forceful kiss thing Jacob does. That aside, Grey saves Ana's life from a vehicle like Edward does and Ana has a crappy car like Bella. Coupled with the fact Kate falls for Christian's brother, there are too many similarities here for me to be comfortable with it. Hopefully this will change later on.

Current opinion: Not as bad as I feared

No One Else Can Have You by Kathleen Hale

I didn't realise until I finished this book just how odd it was. I mean, it's a murder mystery where a teenage girl is killed horribly on the first page and yet it doesn't take itself all that seriously. You know the events the words are describing are awful and yet they don't seem that bad.

Probably one of the first things I should say is I loved this book right up until a certain point. For those of you who have read it, that point is when Kippy goes to the mental asylum. After that, everything just went sort of downhill.

Let's start with the positives. Kippy-I adored Kippy as a character (even if I did think she was a boy for the first five pages which was somewhat jarring when I discovered she wasn't). She's so weird it should be off-putting and yet she remains delightfully likeable and somehow down to earth throughout the whole book. Yes she has issues (everyone has issues basically) but they're just a part of her. She's definitely one of the less annoying YA narrators.

Unfortunately, this strength is also the book's main downfall. I just didn't feel the emotional side at all which is downright weird in a murder mystery. When the actual murderer is revealed, it's almost done with no fanfare at all. There was no emotional impact because the character didn't seem to feel an emotional impact. In fact, everyone reacted just a bit too normally to the brutal murder at the start. Kippy is sad for her friend obviously but the author doesn't focus on what anyone thinks about the actual method of murder. Even at the end in the big reveal, it's just presented as another fact.

Now this alone wasn't enough to make me dislike the book since the first three-quarters are so strong and hey, it almost feels like it could be a stylistic choice done on purpose. But it is a shame when a murder mystery book decides not to make a song and dance about the murder. I would still greatly recommend this book and I'm so glad I read it but if you're hoping for a dark read, you're going to be disappointed.

(Also, final spoilery rant: Does the murderer really have to be the loner kid who was sad after his parents died and collects a bunch of nerdy/weird stuff? Because that stereotype hasn't been done enough)

Overall Score: